Father of the groom speech: short, warm, and done right.

Traditionally, the UK wedding speeches belong to the father of the bride, the groom, and the best man. The groom's father traditionally said nothing — his role was hosting duties and a proud face in the front row.

That tradition has loosened. At many weddings now the groom's father gives a short speech, either as the warm-up act before the father of the bride, or after the groom's speech. Some couples ask him to deliver the formal welcome instead of the bride's father.

However long the slot, keep yourself to three to five minutes. You're the supporting speech — the shorter and warmer yours is, the better the whole run feels.

Every good father of the groom speech follows the same simple shape:

1. Opening — 30 seconds. Who you are, and one line that gets a smile.
2. Your son — 90 seconds. One or two short stories that show who he is, with affection.
3. The welcome — 60–90 seconds. What the bride has brought into his life, and a word to her family.
4. The toast — 20 seconds. Raise your glass to the couple. Sit down.

That's roughly 450–650 words. If you write to this skeleton, you can't go far wrong — and you won't need a single borrowed joke.

You've known your son longer than anyone in the room. The temptation is to pack in everything — the baby years, the football trials, the exams, the first job. Resist it. One good story beats five summaries.

The best father-of-the-groom stories share three qualities:

• They show character, not achievement. Not "he got a first" — but "he rang his gran every Sunday from his halls, every week, all three years."
• They're specific. A real day, a real place, a real thing he said. Details are what make a room listen.
• They end warm. The story should land on something true about him that makes the bride's family glad he's theirs now.

"At nine, Daniel built a "worm hotel" under the apple tree and charged his sister admission. She paid. That was the pattern for the next thirty years — Daniel with a plan, everyone else somehow going along with it. Sarah is the first person who looked at the plan and improved it. Daniel never stood a chance, and he's never been happier about anything."

Notice what that does: it makes people smile, it shows who he is, and it hands the spotlight gently to the bride. That's the whole trick.

This is the heart of your speech, and the part that gets remembered. Two audiences, two short beats:

• To the bride: what she's brought into your son's life, and one specific thing you've noticed since she arrived in it. "Since he met Sarah, he calls home on Thursdays instead of only when the car breaks down." One true observation beats ten superlatives.
• To her family: a genuine, brief welcome — you're glad to be joining forces with them, and the couple's happiness is credit to both families. Don't overthink it; grace comes from brevity, not poetry.

Avoid jokes at the bride's expense here — even kind ones about her driving or her cooking. The room has just met you; they don't yet know you're joking.

End on the toast. Keep it simple and sincere:

"Please stand and raise your glasses. To James and Sarah — may your life together be as happy as today has made us all. To the bride and groom."

Then drink, sit down, and let the next speaker take over. Don't add "and finally…" — there is no finally. The strongest finish is the one that stops.

• Three to five minutes. About 400–700 words. If your draft runs longer, cut your second-weakest story first.
• Practise out loud, five times. Twice in front of a mirror, once to your wife or partner, once in the car, once in the venue if you get a quiet moment.
• Cue cards, not a script. Bullet points. You'll sound like yourself instead of reading an essay.
• Slow down. Nerves add speed. Whatever feels slow to you sounds right to the room.
• Look at the couple for the toast. Not your notes, not your glass. Them.

In Your Words turns your finished speech into printable cue cards with emphasis markers and pause cues, so the words stay with you even if your nerves don't.

• Embarrassing childhood stories that humiliate your son — tease, don't expose.
• Ex-girlfriends, even obliquely. Never.
• Anything that lands at the bride's expense.
• Thank-you lists — the groom and best man cover those.
• A second welcome speech if the bride's father has one planned.
• Family logistics: where the photos are, when the buffet opens. That's the MC's job.
• "He was always hopeless at…" — one affectionate flaw is charming; a character assassination is not.